New Business, Part 2

That business plan I was all fired up about last year? Not really working out. I finished a book in my new shared universe and started another, Zombie Jesus Day (ZJD), with plans to keep going while putting other projects aside.

Instead, I’ve spent the last several months working on I, Suicide (a spinoff novel from The Cupid War) and a Doctor Who fanfiction story. I, Suicide will be a hard sell, and I can’t make any money at all from fanfiction! What happened to the great plan?

What the hell went wrong?

Basically, I kept giving priority to other projects. A lot of those projects were articles for Toronto.com. Those had to take priority because they had deadlines. And they paid. In money. There was also a short story I wrote for an anthology (they rejected it). Each time one of those came up, ZJD had to be put on hold.

Then, when I was typing up what I had of ZJD, I had to have another project to work on during the day (see this post here for more details). I picked up I, Suicide again, and discovered I had a passion for that story once more. And when I was typing up the new chapters of I, Suicide, I tried to get back into ZJD. Only I couldn’t. I’d lost the mojo for it. I ended up doing an I, Suicide short story instead, and picked up the thread of a Section K story (the one with the chocolate zombies, mentioned in my last post), and got into the afore-mentioned fanfic.

So, what’s the plan now? Finish I, Suicide and the Section K story, then see about picking ZJD back up once more. Then start a new novel in the ZJD world.

Unless... you know, stuff happens.

Chocolate Zombies in the Wild, Wild West

There comes a time in any storyteller’s career where he/she will ask him/herself, does this project I’m working on make sense? Is it going anywhere? Am I writing myself into a corner from which I cannot hope to escape?

I’m currently working on a Section K short story where Agent Johnny Tall and a mysterious woman known as the Witch must defeat a horde of zombies made entirely out of chocolate. Why are these zombies made out of chocolate? There is a reason, of course. I’m just afraid it isn’t a very good one.

The chocolate zombies have an objective. I haven’t entirely worked out what that is, yet. Various scenarios have gone through my mind, and concepts are coming together. The thing I keep running into, however, is this: is this objective best brought about with the use of chocolate zombies?

Did any of you see The Wild, Wild West? That Will Smith movie from 1999 that featured a giant steam-powered tarantula? The villain, Loveless, had created this metal monster in order to kidnap the President and force him to surrender the country, or something. One critic wrote in his review, ‘wasn’t there an easier way?’ By which I'm sure he meant, was kidnapping the President an objective that necessitated the construction and deployment of a giant metal steam-powered spider?

And don’t get me started on the anti-aircraft gun atop the metal spider. Put there, no doubt, in case someone invented a flying machine several decades before the Wright Brothers. Lucky thing, too, because without it Loveless would not have been able to shoot down the heroes in a flying machine invented several decades before the Wright Brothers first flight. Because you can never be too careful, I suppose.

But I digress. The point I was taking the scenic route to is, am I writing a giant steam-powered tarantula into my story, in the shape of chocolate zombies?

I sure hope not. However, even if the concept still doesn’t work by the time I reach the story’s end, not to worry – that is what rewrites are for. It might seem preferable to plot each bit of the story out first, but where’s the fun in that? I trust my creative process. If it says chocolate zombies are the way to go, who am I to argue? I’m just the author, man. I just work here. ;)

2014 is... Evil?

Already 2014 is off to a very good start. Today, Violet and I both rejoined the world of the employed! I start a new long-term temp assignment on Monday, and Violet has been hired by our local Home Depot. She's worked for the company before, and enjoyed the experience very much. This news could not have come at a better time - both our EIs have run out!

And while that is certainly good news for both of us, I have something else to report that might just eclipse everything. It's been in the works for a little while now, and I didn't want to say anything for fear of a) jinxing it, and b) getting everybody's hopes up before it was more or less a sure thing.

A production company in Germany has approached me regarding the movie rights for Evil.

I know, eh? Wicked!

But that's not all! I've asked if I can write the script, and they appear open to the idea! Now technically, I can demand that writing the script be part of the rights sale. They are mine, after all, and I can make whatever demands I please. I could ask to be paid in green M&Ms! Of course, if I demand ridiculous stuff, they might decide to go after some other author's book. They have a guy in mind to write the script, but they want to see a treatment from me (ie - how I would adapt the book for the screen) to see if we are more or less on the same page. If so, then I might be a screenwriter once again! If not, no worries. Selling book rights is a fairly new thing for me, and I'm delighted enough at their interest. Writing the script would simply be gravy.

The production company have also expressed interest in The Cupid War. Flux still owns those rights, so they'll handle it. I will, of course, get a sweet check out of that sale!

I will of course provide more details as they happen. In the meantime, I'm just delighted to have some really good news to share!

Oh, and our cats got run over. :(

Kidding! They're fine.

My 2013 Post

So, 2013. Time to look back on it. And for the purposes of blogging, time to reflect on what was good or great about last year, and express positive hopes about the year just begun. Very important not to dwell on the bad stuff, as that would be Unprofessional and No Fun To Read, and just plain WRONG. It might get Too Personal, and nobody really wants that.

Except, I always try to tell the truth on this blog. Or at least, I always want to. I've whitewashed events or glossed over hurts for fear that it would Reveal Too Much, and Drive Readers Away. This blog's main goal is to attract new readers to my work, and to entertain and involve current readers in what I'm up to. It should not be about my personal life, unless it is to mark a positive occasion, or has something to do with my cats.

Everyone loves cat pictures.

But, regardless of what I Should or Should Not say in this blog, I'm going to discuss 2013 for what it was. I suffer from Depression, so even the negative events are positives when you consider that I got through them.

So, what was 2013 for me?

It was the year I landed a decent temp assignment, one that kept the bills paid from January through to June. For the first half of the year, Violet and I had financial stability. The company I worked for liked me so much that they kept me on when one contract ended, then extended my contract two more times. I was well liked by the people I worked with... except for just one person.

It was the year I failed, yet again, to deal with a workplace bully. I stood up to that bully, which for me is huge, but that didn't make things any better. I consider this a personal failure because I wasn't able to brush off this bully's behaviour as the antics of an insecure person. I couldn't just "not be bothered" by this person. I took it personally, I felt weak, and I couldn't rise above it. I still can't.

It was the year I finally qualified for Employment Insurance! That helped tremendously, because I couldn't find any more work until just recently. Job searching continues to be a hard and painful struggle for me. EI allowed us to survive the lean summer and fall months while we dished out resume after resume into the void.

It was the year Violet graduated from George Brown College with a diploma in Graphic Design! Very, very proud of her. This is a huge step forward for her career. My parents came up from Ottawa to be there for the graduation ceremony, and took us out to dinner afterward. Splendid days!

I finished the first draft of a new novel that I feel extremely positive about. I call it I'm So Goddamn Sick of Vampires. I still have to edit it quite a bit, but it is a good story and breaks new ground for me as an author. I also wrote a couple of new short stories, continued working on a Cupid War spinoff I'd started but abandoned in 2011, began a new Doctor Who fanfiction story, and wrote the first 3rd of a new YA Horror Comedy as well.

One of those new short stories had been written specifically for an anthology, following encouragement that I interpreted as a request from the anthology's editors. They turned it down. Second time that’s happened to me. Third, actually, if you count the time a magazine asked me to rewrite a story from a different character’s point of view and then turned that version down, too. That was a kick in the balls. Nevertheless I'm proud of that story, and Violet said it was one of my best.

I wrote numerous articles for Toronto.com. It was a great experience, and gave me a new perspective on professional article writing. For one article, I interviewed two of my co-workers for information on wedding venues. It was a fun experience that I enjoyed tremendously, and the pay was decent, too!

Then, the former editor returned and made some policy changes. One such change was to reduce the fee for articles by half. I decided my writing is still worth the same as before, so I haven't accepted any new assignments from them. A shame. It was great while it lasted.

Doctor Who celebrated its 50th Anniversary! As a big fan of the show, this was a big deal for me. The anniversary special, The Day of The Doctor, did not disappoint, and it was fun having it to look forward to all year.

I attended four conventions this year: Ad Astra, GenreCon, SFContario and Reversed Polarity. GenreCon was especially important for me, for two reasons. One, it wasn't in Toronto; the decision to do a con in Guelph was a big one for me. Two, I was asked by the organizers to come and be a part of the programming. What an honour! That meant so much to me.

I haven't written about my experiences at SFContario this year, or the panel I did at Reversed Polarity. Both were fun experiences, and both presented new challenges. I didn't write posts about those cons, or any posts since November, for reasons I will make clear momentarily.

It was the year I released a new novel, The Five Demons You Meet In Hell! I self-published the book through Smashwords, and it is my second attempt to break into the ebook market (Closets was the first). A good friend of mine, Sarah Water Raven, did a spectacular cover for me, and made me flyers that I handed out at my last three conventions. It was great to get back into the game once more, and with all the promotion I was giving it through my social media sites, I was certain it would be a success!

It wasn't. Or, to be slightly less negative, it hasn't been a success yet. From the day I released it, November 13, until today, I have sold exactly nine copies.

Nine.

9.

I haven’t even been able to break into double digits.

What, I’ve been asking myself, have I been doing wrong? Promoted it at conventions with flyers? Check. Even did a reading from it at GenreCon. Promoted it on the blog? Check. On Facebook? Checkity-check. Fan page and everything. Twitter, too. I have over 1,000 followers on Twitter, and nearly 1,500 Facebook Friends. That’s a lot, isn’t it? And I did special deals, like dropping the price to 99 cents on Black Friday. I figured I’d have sold at least 100 copies by now.

But I haven’t. I’ve sold nine.

NINE.

What. The. Fuck?

I did not take this disappointment well. I went into a serious funk, what many would call ‘Feeling Sorry For Myself’ but a select few would acknowledge as ‘A Depressed Person Dealing With Bad News’. I stopped blogging, withdrew even further from social activities, didn’t even bother to plan my birthday party until the last minute. And on a few dark days, I thought of suicide once more. Not terribly seriously, and never with intent, but always with a strong desire to just Stop. It seemed as if all my efforts, all my hard work, simply hadn’t paid off, and the future did not look bright at all.

I got through it. I always do, with friends and family helping me. I’m feeling better about things, and putting the poor sales of 5 Demons into a different perspective. It’s not the final crashing and burning of my writing career; rather, it is just another learning experience along the way. The book hasn’t had any reviews yet; my next goal is to get some. And, of course, to keep producing output.

So, 2014. Resolutions? Nah. Not unless I can think of some funny ones. What I will do is keep writing, keep going, keep believing in a future where that payoff comes.

And right now, I do believe.

Today is a good day.

5 Demons - The Beginning!

The idea for The Five Demons You Meet In Hell came about because my then-publisher wasn't happy with a trend they saw in my work. I'd just submitted a manuscript to them that I was quite pleased with (aren't I always?) called Young Nostradamus, and they turned it down in fairly short order. "You always write about the bullied kid rising up and beating the odds," my editor told me. "We like to see our authors grow and try new things."

I still have plenty to say about the bullied kid, but I saw the merit in my editor's point of view. What if I mixed things up a little, and wrote from the POV of the bully?

With that thought, Boston Lefebvre was born. Don't ask me where I got the name from - it just popped into my head fully-formed and seemed right. It's certainly memorable. Boston was my bully, around which my new story would wrap.

But if anyone had the notion I was going to sympathize with the plight of the high school bully, well... they have another think bloody well coming! I'll write about a bully, all right... getting what he so richly deserves.

With that in mind, and given my fascination for the metaphysical coupled with my love for demons, it seemed only natural to send my bully Boston Lefebvre to Hell. The title was another inspired bit of brilliance - I just love a good spoof title! Harvard Lampoon has Bored of the Rings, Robert Rankin has Raiders of the Lost Car Park, The Sprouts of Wrath and The Toyminator, and I have a take-off of Mitch Albom's classic. If you meet five people in Heaven, it seemed likely to me you'd get five demons in the other place!

Also, I originally titled the book The 25 Demons You Meet in Hell, because I wasn't sure if five demons would cut it. I needn't have worried; five demons were more than enough to get the job done. Good thing, too - my spoof title works much better as-is!

The story came to me as I wrote it, and it was a joy to put on paper. I'd tell you more, but as one of my favourite fictional characters is fond of saying: "Spoilers!" Go check it out right now, with this link here.

PS: I just found out this very second that I'm not alone in spoofing Mitch Albom's title. There is a book on Amazon called The Five People You Meet In Hell by Rich Pablum! Guess he was faster on the draw. I have not read this work, but I am confident my novel and his are very different. It seems we had more-or-less the same idea on tag lines, however; both of us use the "This is not that book" gag. No worries. There's plenty of room on the Internet for both of us.

PPS: There's also a book called The Five Jerks You Meet On Earth by Ray Zardetto. I'm starting to not feel so special about my title now... :(

Reversed Polarity: A Weekend of Who

Last weekend I attended Reversed Polarity, a special convention put on by the same people who have run Polaris, dedicated to celebrating the 50th anniversary of Doctor Who. It was another fun bash, with panels and good friends and well-known special guests including... get ready for it...

PETER DAVISON!
Peter friggin' Fifth Doctor Davison!!!

What a coup!

My programming schedule was light - only two panels - and problematic at first. I'd been attached to another Star Trek Into Darkness panel, and one on Doctor Who fanfiction. The night before the convention, however, I got an email saying I wasn't signed up for anything! Naturally I was a tad concerned, especially when my emails weren't returned (which is completely understandable, it was the night before the convention and the programming team were busy as all hell). It all turned out okay, as these things often do. My dear friend Corrine McGill (volunteer extraordinaire) took care of my issues in less than five minutes. My revised panel schedule had me doing Star Trek at noon on Sunday, and Fanfiction late Saturday night. Regrettably I had to back out of the fanfiction one; the bus schedule being what it was, I simply couldn't stay that late. That's twice now I've missed out on fanfiction panels! Bummer.

Now that I had my con badge, I was free to roam the con. There was considerably less of it this time around - only half the hotel space a Polaris con usually gets. Nevertheless, the fandom atmosphere was thick and omnipresent, with every second person clad in a Doctor Who costume. Peter Davison gave a talk on stage; I figured there would be an extra cost to see it, so I didn't go. Turns out there was no extra fee, and I'm an idiot. That's two Doctors I could have met this year but didn't (the other one being Colin Baker at Fan Expo).

I did, however, meet and chat with many friends: Jen Frankel, author of the horror novel The Last Rite, who told me she'd loved Epoch; her friend and frequent River Song impersonator Amanda Portelli, who is currently making me a Tardis-shaped notebook; Rebecca Lovatt, who sold me a red shirt for an extremely reasonable price (even though people are just dying to wear red shirts); and many others whom I'm too lazy to name.

The dealer's room did not disappoint. After less than half an hour I'd bought a Doctor Who novel, a Weeping Angel (very popular and hard to find!), and an almost-naked Wolverine action figure for Violet (which she described as "disturbing"). I attended an interesting panel on 4th Doctor Tom Baker, then reluctantly headed home for the night.

On Sunday I had my first and only panel - Star Trek Into Darkness. Violet came with me; she's a big fan of that movie (and an even bigger fan of Benedict Cumberbatch!). I'd been chosen to moderate, and what a job I had. Few in the audience liked the film, and I was the only panelist willing to praise it. And, I had to deal with one of those fans, someone who lives to nitpick in as loud a voice as they can. He interrupted or talked over me with grueling regularity, and my attempts to reign him in were less than effective. Such people can't be contained, only endured - I managed to get my two cents in when he paused for breath. The other two panelists were far better behaved, and just as enthusiastic. I came away feeling drained but still happy. Not long ago I'd have been angry, and I'd ruminate over what I could have/should have done better for hours. Not this time. For me, that's progress.

Violet and I stayed until five, taking in two more panels (6: The Misunderstood Doctor & The 12th Doctor) and even assisting with the putting away of chairs at the end. We also had drinks with friends, some of whom I hadn't seen in a very long time. Very civilized. I didn't get much self-promotion in, but I didn't have to. I was there with some of the best people I know. That was enough.

Later this month I'll attend SFContario once more! Good times.

It's November Next Week!

How did that happen? Well, probably the same way October, September and August arrived, I suppose. Nevertheless, I am once again feeling that the passage of time is occurring far too quickly. And without my consent.

October has been a good month for me. It started extremely well with GenreCon, which amazingly enough is only the second con I've attended this year. My third con, Reversed Polarity, is coming up very soon. It's from the same people who have done the Polaris and Toronto Trek conventions, and it centres around the upcoming 50th anniversary of Doctor Who. I'm booked into two panels.

I prepared and uploaded The Five Demons You Meet In Hell to Smashwords, and I'm delighted to say it meets the requirements of their Premium Club (an honour that means wider distribution). You can have a look at my book's page on the Smashwords site here. I'm still working on some unforeseen complications involving payment and tax issues, but those will be resolved before too long.

Anyone interested in a free preview of 5 Demons can read a sample of it here.

My depression got a little worse this month, partly due to cabin fever. I need structure, and my lack of employment has left me without any. I wrote a kind of 'day in the life of' thing last week, but I'm not sure I want to post it. The day in question turned out to be a fairly bad one, at least for a couple of hours in the afternoon. What I ended up writing is intensely personal; one of the biggest fears a person can have is to reveal one's true, unmasked self.

I have a short-term job starting tomorrow that will last me through to the end of the month. That will be good for me, and my finances.

November promises to be a very entertaining month. Apart from Reversed Polarity, I am looking forward to Catching Fire and Thor: The Dark World. November 23rd is The Day of The Doctor, and of course there will be my own contribution to the world of entertainment - 5 Demons - on November 13!

My writing is going well. I've finished Part III of I, Suicide, and am ready to work on the next leg of Zombie Jesus Day. I'm also working on a new Doctor Who fanfic short story. There haven't been any Toronto.com assignments for a while, but that may change soon.

That's all for now.